The Boys are 7 Months!!

The Boys are growing so fast and sometimes I seriously want to stop time and just absorb every minute of their little lives, every breath, every smile, every cry and every fussy moment. They are absolutely amazing and fill my heart with such amazing joy. I do feel like I miss out on them while I'm at work, but when they smile and laugh at me all of the guilt from being gone literally melts away. I try and soak in as much as I can and stalk them at night from work by logging on to the baby monitor :) Josh also takes lots of video and pictures, so that makes it great! I take weekly pictures of them just like I did when I was pregnant and I post them on The Redhead Files facebook page. I also take a monthly photos with their cute little bowtie stickers that a sweet, sweet friend sent to me during my pregnancy. I love documenting their lives, for me obviously, but also for our family that are out of state.

Armor and Ronin, turned 7 months old on the 8th of August, 7 MONTHS!! How is this possible? I still remember their birth like it was yesterday *sigh*... time sure does fly when you’re having fun! 

We recently took our first road trip with the Boys to visit family in Lake Charles. It was a rather long drive, but they did fantastic on the drive down and overall It was a really nice trip and very much needed for both Josh and I. I got teary-eyed about an hour into our drive thinking, wow… I can’t believe we are traveling back home to see family with our very own family. It was a wonderful feeling. Many of  Josh's family members had not yet met the boys, so everyone got tons of baby snuggles, smiles, kisses and laughs. The boys also swam in the very same pool that Josh swam in as a child. Great memories

Armor is rolling all over the place!! From his tummy he pulls his entire body up from the floor and is basically practicing for future crawling, lol. He loves his bouncer and is now starting fuss when we leave the room. He is very aware of our presence. He smiles and laughs every day and his hair is really starting to come in. Armor is also getting really good at sitting up. He still wobbles a bit and tumbles over after a little while, but overall he’s looking pretty straight. One tooth on the bottom has broken the surface, one right next to it will come any day (hour) and his top two are also coming in right now, poor little guy. Teething hasn't been kind to him. He has Josh's eye color, nose, ears, feet and hands... The rest is all me!

Ronin is going to Physical Therapy each week for his Torticollis and is getting so much stronger. He is starting to roll over on his own from belly to back, and back to belly. He usually only rolls from his right side, so we are working on the left side roll. Sitting is getting better, but he still leans forward and is wobbly, but definitely improving. Ronin recently received a helmet to correct his plagiocephaly. He will have to wear it anywhere from 4-6 months, but I think it will be closer to the 4-5 month range. Ronin has already cut two teeth on the bottom and two top teeth. I call him my teething machine :) He smiles alllll day, everyday and is such a happy little guy. Ronin has my eyes, nose, ears and feet. The rest is alllll Josh!

Both Armor and Ronin are very vocal these days and each of their voices is so different from one another. When we are in another room or I hear them on the baby monitor I instantly know who is who. At their 6 month appointment they both weighed exactly same at 16lbs 10oz and were 27 ½ and 27 ¾ long!! They got vaccinations and did much better this time around. They are drinking 4 bottles a day and each have one full jar of baby food!! I buy nature's best and beechnut, they love sweet potatoes, green beans, squash and pears. I so wanted to make my own food, but seriously… I just don’t have time. Working full time is tough sometimes, but I do what i must in order to support my family. Josh is also a full time student, so our lives are pretty busy these days, but I love it and would not change it for anything in the world. To be honest... I'm madly in love with them and truly amazed at how much our lives have changed in such little time. Josh and I were so excited to know we were finally going to become parents, but there is no way we could have ever known just how amazing it would be, or just how much it would truly affect us. I feel like the luckiest girl in the world.

                                                           Some Instagram love

 

 

Monthly Photos of The Boys

The Boys are 3 1/2 months old now!!

They are smiling, starting to laugh and have both discovered their hands. I have been posting "Monthly" photos on my Facebook page and thought I'd go ahead and add them here too, since I'm trying to get back into this whole blogging thing. It feels weird that I was not blogging for so long considering I blogged for years prior to getting pregnant. Funny how life happens.

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Each day they make me smile and make me realize how everything we went through to get them was completely worth it and that I'd do it all over again if I needed. I never imagine Motherhood feeling this amazing. Sometimes I look down at them during a feeding and just cry the happiest tears!! It still feels like a dream that they are here, that they are mine and that we have been so incredibly blessed to have them in our lives. 

Right now life feels pretty amazing. 

Motherhood is beyond anything I imagined.

We are forever changed. 

Over the next few weeks I plan to blog about the first few months with the Boys, My breastfeeding experience and how we handle Twin life.

I will also blog about Torticollis and Plagiocephaly, because, Ronin is currently dealing with both.

A new challenge. . .

The realization that my Grandmother is gone really set in this week . .

My Grandmother always helped my Dad when he ran into problems, I have helped him too, but now that she is gone. . . he becomes my responsibility. *sigh*. My family is not the type to jump in an help, so I do not expect anything from them, which is okay, because I'm used to that. I don't mean to say that in a bad way, I love my family with all my heart, but now there is no one left to swoop in and rescue him when he can't help his self. So now, I'll take the reins and I will try and keep my sanity.

My Dad has had several strokes over a 6 year period of time. He suffers with COPD, cirrhosis of the liver and can't communicate with most people because of the strokes. My Dad had been staying with my brother over the last several months, they don't get along very well. Last week my Dad left my brothers and went to my Aunts house to stay, then he went to the Hospital. He was there for about 4 days and is now out. He had a flare up of his COPD, and now the doctors are putting him on oxygen throughout the day. When he got out of the hospital yesterday he had no where to go, so I got him a room at a motel down the street for the next week. He get's a disability social security check each month so he has funds, but he doens't have enough to get a place right now and doesn't get paid until the 1st of March. Josh and I are going to help him with a deposit on an apartment that is literally 5 minutes from my house, so I know once we get him settled into a place things will be a bit easier to handle. But right now. . . I feel so overwhelmed with what I'm supposed to do. I need to get him on some sort of housing assistance, but last time I checked there was a 3 year waiting list. I feel anxious about helping him, because I know it is up to me now. I need to write down all of his doctors info and insurance crap and so on. . . His mail already comes to my house, I guess I should start opening it up to figure out what is going on with him, he's unable to read and can't really tell me anything.

I'm fine taking care of my Dad. I've done it before, with all his doctors appointments and stuff, so I'm not concerned about that. Most people in my family don't understand why I won't let him live with me, and that's the part that is hard. Feeling the judgment of others, who in all actuality don't even give a shit about him is hard. And, I wont let him live with me, but I will help him in all other ways I possibly can. I have my reasons. My Dad continues to drink on a daily basis (wakes up at 8am to get a quart of beer and it goes on throughout the day), he is a mean grouchy person who doens't get along with most anyone. Guilt, from not allowing him to live with me is hard to swallow sometimes, but I'm not going to put his happiness above mine or Josh's. Him living with me would make our relationship strained, and like I said, he is kind of a mean person. Emotionally he is destroyed and has been for years, so it makes him a very bitter person, he thinks everyone is out to get him and feels entitled to being taken care of. So, I'm doing what I can the best way I know how. I know my Dad appreciates what I'm doing to help him, but I feel sad for him not being able to do things for his self like he used to. I know he gets very frustrated at times and that is hard to watch.

A few days after my Grandmothers funeral, my Dad called me to let me know he'd run out of gas, he needed me to come and get him, he was at a park in our city. He could not tell me how to get to him. Because of the strokes he's had, he could only tell me that he could see my old school. He stutters on the phone and shakes his hand as if he is creating the word with his movements. I drove around for 20 minutes going to every park I knew of and finally had to call Josh to look up a map of our city so I could find him. . . At least I know what park he likes to go hang out at now, so next time I'll know where to go when he runs out of gas. I just wish his mind worked the right way.

*sigh* 

Life is one thing after another.

Thanks for listening!!

I just needed a place to put my feelings. . .

 

I'm gonna miss her like crazy. . .

Today my heart breaks and I am filled with a great sadness. I have lost the most amazing woman in my life. My grandmother, my Mother. . . the very woman who adopted me at age 9 and raised me into the woman I am today, my best friend and my biggest cheerleader. 

I love you, Mom and I will never, ever forget you or the sacrifices you made to give me a life that I may never have had. You were my rock, I'll miss our weekly visits, your hugs and our many talks. I'll miss you more than words can say and I love you with all my heart!

I only wish. . . I could have one last hug.

Rest in Beautiful Peace

 Madeline Carol Carpenter 

May 19th, 1940 - February 3rd, 2013